Prologue to the Beginning of the End
Ignatius Bagussuputra #lifeA start to the beginning of the end
This was supposed to be published last month, on the 19th of September to be exact! Something special happened that day, or at least I’d like to think so.
For reasons I can’t remember, I had to delay this for over a month, but I think it was a good thing because a lot more stuff happened in between, I don’t even know how so much stuff can happen in just a month.
In the span of this one month delay, it made me change the tone of this post, which was originally really dark, to what you’re about to see here. So, enjoy the rest of this read…
Fragmented Memories
It’s been months since I stopped using any social media, or perhaps “did not care” was what I’m looking for as I do still have all of my accounts, I just left them for archival purposes and did not use them anymore. I find that I get to enjoy life and what makes me happy way better. I get to spend a lot more quality time with my family, especially my parents, and I find myself enjoying the moment, almost all the time, and having them stick to my long-term memory instead of inside the memory of my phone. I guess I’m also talking about my phone in general when I’m referring to social media.
I do think I’m lucky to have this privilege of not having to care about those as I know that not a lot of people can just simply move away from apps that takes away your time like it’s nothing. We’re so used to getting information of other people from their stories or status updates that I feel we’re slowly losing our ability to truly socialize, from human to human. It was scary and weird at first, not knowing what is happening around you, or not updating your status or stories for everyone to look at, or not having anyone responding back to anything that you do. But fear not, because your true friends are going to find a way to reach out to you and stick by your side.
This topic deserves a post of itself, both because I find it really interesting, especially when I’ve experienced it myself right now, and because this is not what we’re here for!
4 Years of Peer Pressure
You know what I meant the moment you saw that number. I’m not gonna lie and pretend that it was the best years of my youth, or if I gain so much that it changed my life. Although, I did gain something out of it, I felt I could’ve done a lot more in 4 years doing other things…
It was absolutely painful, especially near the end of it. There are some times where I’m beginning to question my reasons for being there and even my sanity along with it. A lot of the things that were forcefully given felt useless and doesn’t really have any beneficial values, and I’m still wondering what the purpose was even to this day.
I do gain a lot of other skills and experiences that won’t really be accessible if I didn’t give in to this peer pressure, but my mental state took quite a toll from it that even my mind is starting to think of the things that I never would’ve thought of in my life.
It’s been a couple of months since, and I am feeling a lot better now, thankfully. I don’t really have an ending to this, so I’ll leave this by saying that I would teach my kids and give them the freedom to choose on their own.
Memento Vivere
I am extremely fortunate to be—at the time of writing—here, at this point in my life. A lot of people would kill, figuratively speaking, to have the position I’m in right now. I know a lot of my friends dreams to do what I do. I would be lying if I said luck didn’t play a part, but know that we still have a lot of stuff that are in our control, and opportunities can also happen from our own efforts.
You are yourself. You are important. You count. There is no need to compare it with anyone else besides your old self. Everyone have their own pace, to each their own time. When you feel like giving up, remember why you started! Know that it is you who will get yourself where you want to go, no one else can help or do anything if you don’t start.
Success is not final, failure is not fatal; it is the courage to continue that counts. - Winston Churchill
To everyone reading this, thank you, for sticking until the end, and thank you for being here with me. An even more special thank you for you that knows me in person.
Until next time, Godspeed to you.
Be happy for this moment, as this is your life right now
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